


Kenobi

by JustBeStill (orphan_account)



Category: Star Wars: Rebels
Genre: Anger, Deserts, Humor, Lightsaber Battles, Siri - Freeform, Tatooine, desert planets
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-02
Updated: 2019-05-02
Packaged: 2020-02-16 06:15:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 352
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18685765
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/JustBeStill
Summary: Darth Maul searches for Obi-Wan and finally finds him on Tatooine. An alternate ending to ‘Twin Suns.’Originally written on the day that ‘Twin Suns’ aired. (RIP Maul.)





	Kenobi

Maul dropped to the ground. How will I find Kenobi? Then he got an idea. Pulling out his phone, he said to Siri, "KENOOOOBBBBBIIIIII'S near me." 

Siri thought a moment before replying "I have found three cantaloupes near your location" 

Maul growled, "Not cantaloupes! I want Kenobi!" 

Siri again replied, "I don't see any Den Kobi near you. Shall I search again?" 

Maul screamed in anger. "Not that! I want KENNNNNNNNOOOOBBBBIIIII!" He screamed the last word to the skies. He threw his phone to the ground. "YOU DISAPPOINT ME, SIRI!"

Pulling out his backup phone, he repeated this process until Siri finally said, "I have found 1 Kenobi less than a mile from your location." Finally! After he had found Kenobi, he walked up to him from behind and tapped him on the shoulder, surprising him, who jumped ten feet in the air.

Maul laughed at that and got serious again. "Kenobi. Look how big your head has gotten! Seriously, man, it's the size of a watermelon! Anyway, you're dirty and disgusting, blah blah blah and all that!" He also commented on Kenobi's Boopalicious nose.

Obi-Wan sighed. "Yes, yes, my nose and head are huge, I've heard that before. Why did you come here? Do you want some cooked You?" He held out a pan of Maul’s burnt legs. 

The Zabrak gasped. "MY LEGS! GIVE THEM TO ME!" He snatched them up and frantically tried to reattach them to his body.

Obi-Wan sat there until a voice said, "I have found three Skinny canals with noses near your position." He jumped up into the air again. 

Maul growled, "SHUT UP, Siri!" 

Obi-Wan ran around in circles screaming about blueberries.

Maul got a headache and muttered. "I just farted. It smells delicious. Wanna sniff?" He started trying to wave the scent over to Obi-Wan, trying to make him smell it and die from the stench. Obi-Wan gagged and barfed on Maul's burnt legs. 

“NOT ON MY LEGS! They're ruined now! They're gonna smell like you forever!" 

Kenobi moaned and said, "purple Europe doo!" And died. Maul laughed victoriously and walked away.

The End.


End file.
